Thursday, May 04, 2006

100 Things About Me



The man, the myth, the legend...

I'm stealing this from another blogger, who readily admits he stole it from someone else. I'll give it a go and see if I can make it to 100. I certainly hope I'm interesting enough to do so.

I invite you all to make lists about yourself in the comments, or add some things to my list you think I missed.

  1. Often, I'll start arguments because enjoy arguing.
  2. I'm a photographer.
  3. I'm a writer.
  4. I love sailing.
  5. Terrible movies are a guilty pleasure of mine (see: Army of Darkness).
  6. I love music.
  7. Likely, said music is nobody you've ever heard of.
  8. Someday, I hope to read Finnegan's wake.
  9. I'm a pacifist.
  10. I believe in God, but not the church.
  11. Or the bible, for the most part.
  12. Or telling other people they should have my beliefs because my way is the right way.

  13. I'm a dog person.
  14. Yet I own two cats. (and now 1 dog)
  15. I love beer.
  16. I'm a father and a husband.
  17. I love football.
  18. Before this year, I didn't care much about college football.
  19. Somedays, I wish our government told us everything.
  20. Most days, I'm glad they don't.
  21. I wish politicians were really like the cast of the West Wing.
  22. I wish cigarettes made your breath smell minty, and extended life expectancy by 20 years.

  23. I wish I knew more about HTML.
  24. My favorite movies are W;t, the Shawshank Redemption, and the Adventures of Baron Munchausen.

  25. I'm slowly conceding that I enjoy cartoons more than sit-coms.
  26. My life has been in danger on several occasions.
  27. Having a close non-family member die changed my perspective on life.
  28. I have wonderful parents.
  29. I don't have many friends because I choose them carefully.
  30. and I aggravate the shit out of most people.
  31. I'm very funny, but only to me and the 4 people on the planet who get the joke.

  32. I learn something every day.
  33. Today, it was that teachers in grade school lied to me. Bastards.
  34. Stupid people bother me, but not nearly as much as ignorant people.
  35. I love the beach.
  36. and the sun.
  37. and the outdoors in general.
  38. but I don't let it interfere with my Diablo II addiction.
  39. I love to read. Particularly the Harry Potter series.
  40. But my favorite of all time is A Prayer for Owen Meany by John Irving. Maybe Youth in Revolt. Or anything by Douglas Adams. I smell another top 10 coming.

  41. Simon Birch, the film version of Owen Meany, sucked.
  42. I love watching soccer, but only if I'm at the game.
  43. Same with baseball.
  44. I think farts are funny. Every time.
  45. My favorite beer is Arrogant Bastard Ale. You probably wouldn't like it.

  46. I want my sons to discover God in their own ways, like I did.
  47. I actually like my in-laws.
  48. I can count on my family for anything.
  49. I'd be willing to die for any one of my friends or family members.
  50. I love bacon. I mean, I REALLY love bacon.
  51. I believe in miracles--like sausage, bacon, and ham all coming from the same animal.

  52. I do not like salmon, or tofu.
  53. I secretly like brussel sprouts, but pretend not to so my father doesn't feel alone. And so I can tease mom.

  54. I hope I never live in Ohio again.
  55. I think we make our own luck.
  56. I get tired quickly when people complain.
  57. I yawn a lot when people are talking to me, but not because I'm bored. The truth is, I don't know why I do.

  58. I snore. Loudly.
  59. I'd like to release my cats into the wild, but my wife won't let me. Well, maybe just Norbert.

  60. If I did release him, I'd miss him.
  61. I hate it when my wife is right (see: Norbert).
  62. I hate being wrong in general.
  63. I'm very competitive, even when I'm trying not to be.
  64. I used to drive a hybrid car, and I loved it.
  65. The Bush Administration scares me.
  66. Not many things scare me.
  67. Someday, I hope I write a novel.
  68. I hope more than 10 people buy it.
  69. Somedays, I really miss New York.
  70. I often think to much. And over-analyze.
  71. I got in a fight once on Thanksgiving Eve.
  72. The media, in general, is lazy and irresponsible.
  73. I shouldn't throw stones.
  74. I no longer think O.J. is guilty. Just kidding.
  75. I still think Courtney killed Kurt. Not kidding.
  76. I own two Sirius receivers, but only one is in use at the moment.
  77. I love my wife very much.
  78. I love my sons very much too, but differently.
  79. Many people find me offensive at times.
  80. I often think, "fuck them..."
  81. I truly don't care what others think about me.
  82. Except my friends and family.
  83. I really wish I could fly.
  84. I daydream constantly.
  85. I can keep a secret, but often wish I didn't have to.
  86. By most people's standards, I've never cheated in a relationship.
  87. I think truth and perception are the same thing.
  88. When I die, if I can come back and haunt someone, I will.
  89. One of my favorite things is the look on my son's face when I get home from work or when I pick him up from day care.

  90. I also enjoy tennis.
  91. Despite all of my success, I still feel awkward around women.
  92. I've given up on understanding women, or teaching them that men aren't just pretending to be simple creatures.

  93. Women are definitely smarter than men.
  94. I spend a lot of my time wondering what my sons will be when they grow up. After that, I usually wonder what I will be when I grow up.

  95. I'm really fond of art. All of it. Even performing art.
  96. Once, I covered a girl's ears when I farted so she would be none the wiser. That fart was especially funny. Especially the horrified look on her boyfriend's face.

  97. I don't believe we have predetermined destiny.
  98. I would definitely kill another human being if I thought the lives of my wife and children were in danger. I wouldn't think twice about it.

  99. I really hope I'm never in that position.
  100. I hate shoes. Most of you know that.

So there you have it. 100 things. It really wasn't very hard, and I think I learned some things about me that I never thought too much about before. Try it.

12 comments:

the warrior said...

Ben,

Nice steal, very nice. I tried doing something like making a list once and I will again. The one list was for a dating service thingy and the sad reality is, the persons I was most compatible with based upon my list, were the persons I was the least attracted to even in a friendship sort of way. Opposites must attract or I simply just have too much air in my ego, possibly a combination of both air and ego. Either way, I quit the dating service and am still a 'single' survivor. And no worry, there are a lot of people that choose to hate brussel sprouts, its all good.

Jen said...

So many of thoes I agree with entirely. Let me list my favorites:

Terrible movies: I don't know how I made it thru Army of Darkness...

You aggrevate the shit out of most people: True. Me sometimes, but that's not going to keep me from not talking to you.

You're funny...in a strange way that you laugh at first, and eventually the other 4 people see your point of view and laugh along.

Your farts are funny, but DavidsChinese bus food farts...they were hilarious

Pa and Ohio: I'm trying to work my way towards the border too. Unfortunately it's the Pa Ohio border.

Norbert: it would definately be much more quite around your household. No breaking things, cats bounding over furniture, and scattering food all over the place. You have Tomas for that now.

I'll buy your novel.

You're one of the few men who actually acknowledges the fact that we're smarter than you. Thank you.

Jay said...

Here's three from me:

1.When it comes to dessert, there is no such thing as “too rich.” I hear people say things like “I can’t finish this chocolate cake, it’s too rich.” Nonsense. Remember the killer ├ęclair at the Taste of Springfield? You know, the one that was supposed to kill Homer? I could down about four of them.

2.I hate the Goth Kids. Nothing pisses me off more than a group of spoiled brats, trying to be non-conformists by dressing up like every other Goth kid. Conforming is conforming, whether you are conforming to society’s accepted standards, or the standards of your retarded little friends in black that think they are the first ones to ever dress that way or pierce that body part. Half of me wants to beat the crap out of them, half of me wants to educate them, and half of me wants to just make fun of them a whole lot. I’ve tried all three, and nothing seems to work.
3.I love cities that riot after their football/basketball/hockey/baseball/soccer/little league team wins/loses a championship. Nothing shows heart and passion for your team like rolling police cars, looting, and burning your own city to the ground. That said, good luck to the Bills this season.

Paul said...

I'm such a thief. Did you notice who I stole it from?
;)

Erica said...

"Stupid people bother me, but not nearly as much as ignorant people."

I think this one was my favorite. I can relate.

I'll buy your novel, too.

D said...

Hope you don't mind, but I'm going to steal this 100 things about me thing too.

And I do like Arrogant Bastard Ale by the way - there's a great bar in Ohio City (one of a scant few good bars in NE Ohio) that has it on tap.

A responsible working mother said...

I think farts are funny, too. Every time.

stephan said...

I enjoyed your list, except for the part about Courtney killing Kurt. But I dont think you really believe that anyway. But you seem like a cool guy.

Nicole said...

Ok, I am not surprised by some of the things on this list.
Esp, the wanting to come back and haunt people one.
Or the arguing one
but was happy to read the acknowledging that women are smarter. Train your son well, save him years of puzzlement.
Cheers!
Ps. I have an inkling that underneath it all, you just might be a big teddybear...

Dave said...

If you had a suggestion box, that is where i would post my suggestion to get a suggestion box, so i could throw out random topics you could write about....

Mocha said...

Ben,

I'm glad you steered me over here because I enjoyed your list very much. I only take issue with a few things:

1. Cigarettes should taste like Jolly Rancher Green Apple candy. All the time.

2. Aggravating the shit out of people is an art form. Carefully perfecting this over the years is one of my greatest accomplishments. Plus, it's just really fun to do.

3. Being able to fly is a really nice idea. But if you could have any super powers, I would think that having retractable claws would come in handy. (Refer back to number 2, please)

Anyone who loves John Irving, Douglas Adams, and yet believes that women are smarter than men is ok in my book.

Unless you wrote the part about women just to get in good with your wife. Then, it would suck.

But, you seem trustworthy. It's that fart connection thing we have.

tam said...

I do not blame you for not wanting to live in Pennsylvania...the State Troopers are nasty..No humor at all!

Also the "fart thing"...Have you seen the movie Click...there is a great fart scene. Totally disgustingly funny! Good movie for people living the fast lane.