Saturday, April 29, 2006

NFL Draft Day

No matter how much I shouldn't be, I am always surprised by the number of athletes that are total dumbasses. I'm not going to post a mock draft or anything like that, since we'll find out for real in the next 10 hours. What I can tell you is that Mario Williams will be selected first overall, and Reggie Bush is the latest inductee to the Athletic Dumbass Club (ADC).

Here's what I can do--I'll predict future studs and turds, regardless of round drafted.

1) Reggie is a dumbass, but he's still a stud.
2) Leinart is french for 'dumbass.'
3) Vince Young scored a 'dumbass' on the wonderlic test, but could still succeed. Could...
4) D'Brick is built like D'Shithouse.
5) AJ Ball-Hawk is a steal no matter where he goes. Urlacher Part II.
6) Huff is studly. Even Millen can't possibly screw this up.
7) Cutler is the cream of the 06 QB crop. He'll be the success story.*
8) LenDale White eats more pork rinds than Oprah on a night of binge drinking after being dumped. Dumbass...
9) Stud doesn't describe Vernon Davis. Guys just aren't supposed to be able to do what he can do...
10)DeAngelo Williams He's going to slip, and it's a crime. This kid plays like he's 100 feet tall. He'll try to make you think, 'Reggie who?' this year.

There you have it. Some studs and turds. More on this Saturday night, perhaps Sunday morning. May your team not draft who I hope the Bears draft.

Here's a draft day tidbit (I'll update this post as often as I can):

LenDale White - RB - Player

The LA Daily News reports USC RB LenDale White tested positive during an NFL drug test.
"(The NFL) ain't worried about it," White said. "The issue's been addressed." The power back's stock has been in a free fall since the Combine and yet another off-field question mark could push him completely off teams' draft boards. An April MRI revealed earlier White has a torn hamstring. Apr. 29 - 8:11 am et
Source: Los Angeles Daily News

As reported on DUMBASS!

*Denotes value if drafted by any team but Baltimore. If drafted by the Ravens, Cutler becomes worthless, without value, NOT a guaranteed success.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...


tee-hee! that cracks me up every time. What a name.